THE END & BEGINNING.

the last blog of my summer... and i write this with deep sadness. a sadness that you cannot see when you see me, but a sadness that lies deep within my heart that makes me wonder if i really did live up summer '08. i don't want to talk about the philippines anymore... so we'll fast-forward to when i came back.
first to say... i matured a lot over the summer. matured as another ordinary teenager, but with a mind of my own. i've gotten the freedom i've longed for.. and i'm definitely grateful for my boyfriend for that. he's the reason why i get most of this freedom. when i came back from the PI, i encountered the worst of my summer days... constant thinking, late nights just lying on my bed listening to acoustic love songs. some were stupid; some were worth fighting for; but they were all worth it because i've learned in just those days what a bitch i can be. how i'm such a perfectionist, and as good as being a perfectionist sounds... it has a lot of downs.
but after those worst summer days, came the brightest of my summer. our love was tested through many trials and trembulations... but we got through it! :] i was relieved so much.. and so chris's birthday was soon. i wanted to make it special. it was really hard.. now i don't know what to get him next year! HAHA. but man.. everything was nearly perfect that day. it was my first FULL day with him.
i really didn't get to spend as much time with my friends as i liked. and.. i truly am sorry for those friends that are reading this. i will make it up to you all somehow. i don't want to lose you guys because i have so many important people in my life, that i don't want to lose a single one of you guys.

and all of you ask this when we talk on AIM
"so.. how's the love life?"

how is my love life? sometimes i say okay. sometimes i say good. right now... i'd have to say my love life is.. true. i am not infatuated anymore. i've found a love that is what i look forward to every morning and every night. and he should know that he will always be on my mind somehow. this summer we've celebrated our 4 months... and im just.. shocked, amazed, flabbergasted as i love to say. if you knew us during our first stares and where we are today you would say that we have changed.. and that's because we have changed each other. our love is getting stronger, our emotions deeper, our morals the same, but our happiness is growing everyday.

summer '08. what to say about you. this is the summer i've matured more. maybe it's because i'm going into high school. maybe it's because i've got a wonderful boyfriend here for me. maybe it's because i've discovered the world a little bit more. or maybe it's just because i'm slowly getting into the real world. this truly is my favorite season. a time to discover more about yourself, the world, your loved ones. i have to admit i've taken moments for granted... but i've taken advantage of many memories i will remember.

today almost ended with a sour note. thank God it didn't. maybe i overreact.. or maybe it's just because i'm scared and anxious of high school. i mean.. i am. but deep down i do have some excitement on what it will give me. i miss chris. i wish i spent my last day of summer with him because he is the reason for all my happiness this summer. he is the reason i have LIVED UP '08. no matter what we've been through.. he will always be the only guy i love. and i really mean that. i can be with him.. doing absolutely NOTHING and i'd still treasure every moment. he's why i look forward to waking up every morning. he is and will always be.. the soundtrack of my summer.

I LOVE YOU SUMMER '08.